A number of times over the past few days I have experienced a certain degree of knee pain, usually after walking, swimming or leaping off very hugh sand dunes. Finally, today, Will expressed his irritation and concern stating that I really do need to visit the doctors and get my knees sorted out. I will do this under certain conditions. I know that when someone goes in for domestic surgery, a nose or boob job for example they are presented with a number of possibilities and they select their personally preferred option. If I do indeed end up requiring a knee replacement operation then I want to be given a comprehensive catalogue of available knees. At the moment I would like a flamingo knee on my left leg and a dogs knee on my right. In fact if this is possible then I assume that this would be the case for all joint replacement, could be interesting. Squid shoulder joints, do they have shoulders even? An owls neck would be pretty good, the possibilities are endless.
On another note, I am currently sitting awaiting my flight from Aberdeen to Gatwick, in front of a TV that is forcing me to watch the Olympics, hence my complete nonsense. Over the last few weeks I have heard various bits on the TV and radio concerning now defunct Olympic disciplines such as bicycle polo, real pigeon shooting, tug-of-war, real tennis, rugby union and cricket to name but a few. It has occurred to me that if sports or disciplines can be discontinued then it must follow that new ones can be added, which they have. I, for one would like to see the following included; bog swimming, lilo river running, British Bulldog, stuck in the mud and Buckaroo. Come on Olympics committee get your shit together and make future events worth watching.
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